Disarm
by breeze33
Summary: What I choose is my choice. Whats a boy supposed to do? The killer in me is the killer in you, my love I send this smile over to you." D/H AU for DH! R&R pretty please!


A/N: AU for DH! Cause DH kills all chance of D/H so I kinda just ignore it!! Please review … I really hope people like this … Reviews are my only way of knowing what works and what doesn't so bring on constructive criticisms! I also need a beta … anyone up for the task please message me!!! Alright then the story is very dark and some sexual content in later chapters! It will be from Draco's POW and in first person which is always a little hard! Please review ... if you take like two seconds to say sucks or keep going I really am so thankful! Thanks for taking the time to read!!! Okay now on with the story!!

**Disarm**

_"I used to be a little boy  
So old in my shoes  
And what I choose is my choice  
Whats a boy supposed to do?  
The killer in me is the killer in you  
My love  
I send this smile over to you"- Smashing Pumpkins_

My eyes burn as I watch the fire light dance. I let out a long deep breath causing the red flame to flicker blue and orange. The oxygen escaping my lips manipulating the flame to twist and turn to my will. I cause it to bend and spark. With one harsh breath I could extinguish it forever. The air I breath becoming a murderer and overpowering the weak flame until it dies out. How true that is of my soul. To kill something so beautiful and precious for my own satisfaction. To manipulate it to my own will and always getting what I want. But I don't. Instead I simply watch the flame dance. The small fire from the candle light flirts with my breath. The flickering light intoxicates my grey eyes but I only watch it from across the table. Never getting to close to it.

This flame it intrigues me. It captivates me. And I fucking want nothing more in this world then to save it.

I stare at it until morning creeps through the windows. The burn in my eyes slowly disappears as the light cause the flame to be less bright. But I still can't look away. I still give it my full and undivided attention. So desperate to keep it alive. To keep it dancing. To keep it flirting with my breath. But the wick has all but burned out. The wax has spilled onto my desk. The candle is dying and suddenly my eyes start to burn again. I have been doing this now for weeks. Staying up till all hours of the night and day trying to figure out a way to save the candle.

I have found nothing. The candle always dies. No matter how much I protect it from my breath the flame burn to strongly and kills itself. And all I can do is watch if fight desperately for the last few seconds before disappearing into the swirl smoke. Gone forever. I slam my first down onto the desk. The mixture of frustration and exhaustion overwhelms me and I fight back tears. I am running out of time. She is running out of time. I rub my temples with my fingers trying to fight off the wave of the wave of emotions engulfing me. If my task given to me by the Dark Lord last year was impossible then this was nothing short of performing a miracle. A fucking miracle. I am no angelic creature and I can't point my wand and do such things. The only wizard who could died because of me and now her fate hangs in my hands.

The clock chimes in the library bringing my attention back to reality. I start to organize the endless piles of books I had collected over the night. Useless to me. They contain no information I need. Running a hand through my messy head of silver I straighten my robes and make my way out of the library. It is still early, a few hours before classes begin, so I make my way to the headmasters office. He will want to know if I have made any progress. The answer is still the same.

As I walk down the hall the robes around me billow out. My strides are long and quick. I never walk slow and when people do I push then out of my way. Life is too short to fuck around. This world is dying and I don't want to be the idiot who spent its last months being a sloth. I make my way to the headmasters office and knock. He doesn't use the formers office and for that I am grateful.

If he did, I would probably throw up with the guilt of being in the dead mans private space. I never want to see that office again. After a few moments the door lurches open and I stride in. The man sitting in the chair before me looks the same as always. Bored, annoyed, and well bored. He doesn't greet me or smile, just stares at me waiting to report. I know my Godfather like the back of my hand.

I shake my head no and he seems to think about my answer for a second. Then placing his elbows on the desk he leans forward and folds his hands across his mouth. Deeply thinking. I turn to leave at this knowing there is nothing left to say. As I reach for the door his voice stops me in my tracks.

"She is running out of time Draco." He draws slowly. As if he doesn't even care. I turn to face him and nod. "Hermione Granger will die if we don't find a cure for her." I know my face remains blank but my mind begins to race. My heart begins to panic. He gives me a nod and I turn and leave the room. Walking down the hallway I finally turn the corner and slump to the floor. Pulling my knees to my chest I slam my head against the stone wall.

"How the hell am I going to save her?" I ask myself the question over and over again. Thinking of everything but finding nothing. It has been three weeks since she returned to school. She came pretending to be a prisoner of war. Snape had managed to keep her safe and under the radar of you know who. Besides the Dark Lord only wants one person these days. If she isn't with Potter then he doesn't care where she is. The war was coming to an end an there epic duel was coming soon. At first I had wondered why she had returned to Hogwarts of all places. Only a few days later did Snape tell me what had happened.

She had been cursed while on the run with Potter and Weasly. It was dark ancient magic and it was deadly. The curse slowly spreads poisoning the victim more with every spell they cast. Potter had sent her back to Hogwarts when she wouldn't stop using magic to save them. She was to strong willed and would do anything to save her friends. Even if it killed her. Snape had agreed to help her when he discovered the true reason for her return. He wasn't all bad they now knew and trusted him to help her. For once Potter had something clever up his sleeve. But the Hermione Granger I had last seen almost a year ago was gone.

She is weak and frail looking. She does not attend classes and rarely makes it down for meals. Most of the students believe this is because she is being held against her will. But I know the truth. The poison doesn't wear off with time. Even if she never used magic again, her health would remain in this state. She would forever be weak and sick. Hermione Granger would never be the brave know it all again and for some reason I couldn't bare the thought of that. So many things had gone so fucking wrong in this war. So many things lost. Looking at the shadow that was once the brightest witch of our age made me want to vomit.

Snape asked me to help her when she came back. He knows I have knowledge of the dark arts and ancient magic. But this curse, I always believed it to be an urban legend. When he told me the brunette had been cursed with it my heart sank. When he told me I would help him save her my mind raged. I was angry to be given an impossible task yet again. But I owed Snape my life and he knew I was seeking redemption. She was now mine.

And I want to save her. I want to make her whole again. Snape is a twisted man because he knows how I feel about her. When I had promised to help him fight for the order he had used Legilimency to see my motive. He had seen things I had never shared with anyone. He had seen how I felt about her. Snape knows, uses, and abuses my most dominating personality trait to his advantage. His darling Godson always gets what he wants. Always. And right now I want nothing more then to save her life, clear my name, and make it out of this war alive.

After a few moments I get myself together focusing on this goal. I am no help to her if I begin falling apart. I slowly stand and begin to head towards my dormitory. After a short nap I would head to breakfast and then potions. But know I wont pay attention. I know I will only think about one thing. Stalking down the halls I consider a few different avenues of research. I turn the hall and suddenly there she is.

Slowly walking down the hallway, most of her weight in placed on Ginny Weasly. She looks pale and thin, her steps are small but I can see her fighting. She must be heading to Snape's office. The two girls don't notice me at first giving me a few moments to stare at my impossible task. To look her up and down and see how she is progressing. I can tell she has used magic. She has lost about five pounds since I saw her last week. I want to walk over and slap her. I make a mental note to tell Snape to break her fucking wand tonight. When they finally notice me they practically snarl.

A slow smirk spreads across my face. It's only natural. I narrow my eyes and square my shoulders making my 6'1' frame look even larger to the petite girls. Making my way closer the young Weasly stands protectively in front of Granger. Pushing the fringe out of my eyes I almost laugh. Almost. "Looking lovely as ever Granger." I slowly start. She meets my eyes and glares. It's a look of pure hate.

"Sod off Malfoy." The red head snaps. She reminds me of a protective mother bear or some shit.

"Careful Weasly," I growl. "No one likes a bitch." At this Granger puffs her chest out and takes a step towards me.

"And no one likes a Murderer." She says icily. I take a step closer and look down at them both. My eyes are cold and blank. Then before they can say anything I continue walking towards my dorm. I have no comeback to her statement. She is right. Plain and simple.

"Come on Hermione were almost there." The Weasly whispers but I hear it clearly.

"Thanks Ginny." I heard Granger weakly say. "Malfoy's such a coward." She finishes.

With my back to them now my smirk falls. Coward? I am many things but a coward I can honestly say I'm not a coward. Accessory to murder? Yes. But I had my reasons. My parents lives being the main two.

Before I get to angry I remind myself she doesn't know I'm helping her. I am risking everything by helping her. My life, my parents, and my friends by keeping secrets from the Dark Lord. But I made Snape promise not to tell her. Because if she knew I was helping she would want to thank me. Maybe even be my friend or some bullshit. I may not know how this will turn out but I know one thing for sure. If Hermione Granger ever smiles at me the way she does her other friends, then my heart would be completely done for. And her life would be in even more danger then it is now.

Every night my breath doesn't touch the candles it lives longer. Every night my breath flirts with the candle it always dies faster.


End file.
